Write the words of this act the way you think they should read. Solon shows your change as a redline against the published text and pins it to that exact text, so it can never be applied to wording you did not see.
Change 1
As published
67 Notification of a personal data breach to the Commission
(1) If a controller becomes aware of a personal data breach in relation to personal data for which the controller is responsible, the controller must notify the breach to the Commission—
(a) without undue delay, and
(b) where feasible, not later than 72 hours after becoming aware of it.
(2) Subsection (1) does not apply if the personal data breach is unlikely to result in a risk to the rights and freedoms of individuals.
(3) Where the notification to the Commission is not made within 72 hours, the notification must be accompanied by reasons for the delay.
(4) Subject to subsection (5), the notification must include—
(a) a description of the nature of the personal data breach including, where possible, the categories and approximate number of data subjects concerned and the categories and approximate number of personal data records concerned;
(b) the name and contact details of the data protection officer or other contact point from whom more information can be obtained;
(c) a description of the likely consequences of the personal data breach;
(d) a description of the measures taken or proposed to be taken by the controller to address the personal data breach, including, where appropriate, measures to mitigate its possible adverse effects.
(5) Where and to the extent that it is not possible to provide all the information mentioned in subsection (4) at the same time, the information may be provided in phases without undue further delay.
(6) The controller must record the following information in relation to a personal data breach—
(a) the facts relating to the breach,
(b) its effects, and
(c) the remedial action taken.
(7) The information mentioned in subsection (6) must be recorded in such a way as to enable the Commission to verify compliance with this section.
(8) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
(9) If a processor becomes aware of a personal data breach (in relation to personal data processed by the processor), the processor must notify the controller without undue delay.
Your change, as a redline
67 Notification of a personal data breach to the Commission
(1) If a controller becomes aware of a personal data breach in relation to personal data for which the controller is responsible, the controller must notify the breach to the Commission—
(a) without undue delay, and
(b) where feasible, not later than 72 hours after becoming aware of it.
(2) Subsection (1) does not apply if the personal data breach is unlikely to result in a risk to the rights and freedoms of individuals.
(3) Where the notification to the Commission is not made within 72 hours, the notification must be accompanied by reasons for the delay.
(4) Subject to subsection (5), the notification must include—
(a) a description of the nature of the personal data breach including, where possible, the categories and approximate number of data subjects concerned and the categories and approximate number of personal data records concerned;
(b) the name and contact details of the data protection officer or other contact point from whom more information can be obtained;
(c) a description of the likely consequences of the personal data breach;
(d) a description of the measures taken or proposed to be taken by the controller to address the personal data breach, including, where appropriate, measures to mitigate its possible adverse effects.
(5) Where and to the extent that it is not possible to provide all the information mentioned in subsection (4) at the same time, the information may be provided in phases without undue further delay.
(6) The controller must record the following information in relation to a personal data breach—
(a) the facts relating to the breach,
(b) its effects, and
(c) the remedial action taken.
(7) The information mentioned in subsection (6) must be recorded in such a way as to enable the Commission to verify compliance with this section.
(8) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
(9) If a processor becomes aware of a personal data breach (in relation to personal data processed by the processor), the processor must notify the controller without undue delay.
One line that says what changes, such as "Halve the dog tax".
Who it helps, what it costs, what it fixes. It is what persuades people to support it.
A proposal here is not law. Support on Solon is evidence that people want the change; the official route says what it takes to make it law.
Sign in to file your proposal. What you have written stays on this page.
Ask what your change would do, who would gain and who would bear a cost, and where something like it is already law. The assistant reads your draft as it stands, cites the law and the studies it finds, and takes no side. What you file stays yours.